Thursday, January 14, 2010

A New Year, A New Format for JC:E!

Hello my children! It's 2010, the Mayans are coming to kill us all in 2 years, and in the spirit of growth and change I hereby re-launch (sort of) this blog.

The old format, of in-depth answers to a variety of questions, was too difficult to keep up with daily.

Instead, I'll be adopting the "flippant summaries of news items, containing nuggets of truth" approach. You send me articles, I read them, and synopize, in my own snide fashion.

We start today with an article sent to me by reader "DJ Pu Yi"

Google Pulling Out of China, China Not Preggers

Wall Street Journal, Jan. 13, 2010

Ok so basically Google is getting the hell out of China, because China totally googled "American indutrial secrets and Tibetan sympathizers" plus "students" and hacked the hell out of some poor kids (bad), and stole some proprietary info from big American companies (neutral/all's fair in love and capitalism). Google can now sort of claim a moral victory over the evil Communists, and their censorship, except that now the Chinese (people, not gov't) are going to have to use this super-censored search engine called "Baidu," which is Mandarin for "No Freedom For You".

The REAL reason Google is pulling out of China is that it wasn't making any money there; Google can concievably get more money by saying all "look how democratic we are and stuff" than hanging around China, anyways. Please note that our major manufacturers aren't about to split town anytime soon, now that China is the largest market for cars and cellphones in the world...

Also, the general "international business community" is upset because the Chinese are making the business environment more uncomfortable for foreigners, i.e., exactly what the United States did in the 19th and early 20th centuries, which is what led to the USA we know and love today, and Britain too, so the "international business community" can go "fuck itself".

Also also, it might actually be good for the assorted dissidents, students, etc., to use US google instead of China google. Maybe. We'll see.


Please leave articles you'd like me to summarize in the comments section. If you have my personal email, you can use that as well.


Gregory Michael Travis said...

But sir, what about Google's concerns for the safety of their employees? Is that a valid reason, or just another excuse to hide a calculating decision?

James Call: Expert said...

Well, insofar as an employee is an asset of the company, it's a calculating decision that happens to be "morally good" as well.

Skinnyd said...

Can the chinese use american google isn't it blocked there?

James Call: Expert said...

Yup, it's blocked. The Chinese are fucked. Apparently Google is trying to retain some of its Chinese engineers, but no more or normal Google for the Chinese.